A list of ten: Mega Man.

From time to time, I plan to do little top 10 lists on various subjects. The first in this series is regarding the Mega Man game series from Capcom, and a list of 10 reasons why it was so great, as well as 10 reasons why it was possibly one of the toughest and most infuriating games to ever have been released.

So without further ado, The List of Ten reasons why the Mega Man series was so great.

1. 8-bit Heavy Metal Soundtrack
C’mon, you guitar players out there all at one time or another tried to play the Mega Man 3 theme or Bubble Man’s theme, admit it.

2. Collectable Weapons!
Say what you want about Halo, Doom, or any FPS…it never had weapons like Giant rocket-propelled fists, circular saw blades, killer spinning tops, or bombs that look and act like tiny snakes.

3. Progression in Gameplay without deviation in the original format.
You always knew how the game was played, you knew there was 8 robots you had to beat, and then eventually you’d have to kick their master’s ass at the end. But somehow, this constant formulaic style of play never bothered you.

4. The oh-so-lovable (and useful) robot dog, Rush.
This dog puts other lovable, indispensable robot companions such as R2-D2 and K9 to shame…I mean come on, HE TURNS INTO A SUBMARINE!!

5.  Arm Cannon.
There is nothing so cool to an 8-year-old, as having an energy weapon as an appendage…it’s about as bad ass as it gets.

6.  Kick-Ass bosses.
Boss battles in Mega Man were always the high point of the game, Every time you saw that telltale “gate” to the boss, with the “Dr. W” over it, you knew shit was gonna go down, and you knew that, just like the Highlander, at the end of it all, there could be only one.

7. The knowledge that, at some point, there will be yet another new game in the series.
What is there, like, 30 of these games now?!
8. Inventive and wacky enemies.
Killer rabbit-bots that throw carrots, giant cats that cough hairballs at you, and walking construction helmets….need I say more?

9.  Dr. Light looks like a white-haired George Lucas.
Please, someone other than me HAS to have noticed this…the similarities are UNCANNY!!

10. It’s bright and noisy.
With the colourful enemies, Mega Man’s technicolour costume changes, the barrage of sound effects and music, this game could surely induce seizures….but we love it anyway.

So that’s what made the games so great, but they weren’t always now, were they? There was always points where you wanted to huck the controller at the screen in frustration. And there were things about the games that just made them unbearably silly…and here they are.

1. DISAPPEARING BLOCKS!
Yeah, you know what I’m talking about….you’re standing over a seemingly impassable pit (sometimes one with spikes in it),  you hear that horrifying “vooooot….vooooot” noise those things made as each one shimmers into existence, and your first thought is “oh crap, not these.”

2. Horrible Box Art.
The box art for the first Mega Man looked like Tron with guns, whereas Mega Man 2 had him looking more like some pansy in an ice dance costume with a football helmet.

3. Framerate problems.
Mega Man 3 was plagued with these….the worst would be when they started while you were trying to dodge or run away from something, and the game would suddenly slow down.

4. DISAPPEARING BLOCKS!!!
Seriously, they really, really suck!!!

5.  Flash Man’s Weapon.
Did anyone EVER get any use out of that thing?? ‘cos I sure as hell didn’t.

6.  1,2,3,4,5,6…umm….X…X2? 7??
Whether it’s the odd numbering schemes for each game past 6, or the fact that they can’t get their dates straight (when in the hell is 200X???) this is proof that the Capcom production staff can’t count. (believe it or not, there’s actually more proof of this, but more on that in a future post.) Not to mention, can someone PLEASE tell me, what happened to Mega Man 8 and 9???

7 . Spikes.
To borrow a line from Adam Sessler, You would think, after so many years, that Dr. Light, being as smart as he is, would engineer something to help protect Mega Man from those stupid things.

8. DISAPPEARING BLOCKS!!!!!
Have I mentioned I hate them? yeah?? okay…just wanted to clear that up.

9. Password Bingo.
Back before Battery Backups were standard in cartridge-based console games, there was the password. Kid Icarus had it, Metroid had it, every game did. Remember the absolutely retarded password system in the Mega Man series? It was essentially bingo. You matched up coloured dots on a matrix-like grid of letters and numbers…It was infuriating trying to remember the passwords, and you would sit there drawing them out on a piece of paper whilst hearing that annoying password screen music playing over and over.

10.  Megaman NT Warrior.
If you are a Mega Man fan, this is never spoken of. I will say nothing more about it other than if you DON’T know what I’m speaking of, and you REALLY want to, look on Wikipedia…because I REFUSE to acknowledge this travesty.

So, there we have it, the top 10 things that made Mega Man great, and the top 10 things that made it lame. Have anything you wanna add? feel free to leave a comment.